How to Win A Writing Competition at Hubpages

I wrote this article a while back with a specific HubPages writing competition in mind.

Although I have edited it to be it more generic and less specific, and certainly less calorific (although not thin content obviously) - it may still refer to elements of that first competition.

While this may lessen it's usefulness in the mind of some readers, they are not the sort I want reading this anyway.

It may contain some valuable pointers for the aspiring writer who is keen to enter and win one of those regular competitions.

That's my hope anyway, because it either has some purpose or I need to bin it... and I don't want to do that.

If I get enough comments saying "bin it, scrap it or dump it" then regretfully I will have to ignore them.

This is one of those Hubpages only articles – you know – the type that no one outside in Google land will ever be looking for.

Never mind. I enjoy writing and I don’t expect traffic these days so let’s just rock on in a literary fashion.

One minor itemlet before I commence with my offering. I do know that proper articles should be written in the third person but unfortunately there’s only me here, so…

This page is a preliminary to the competition, a warm up of the sort of top class output my single fan (thanks Mum!) has come to expect. It is a way to prepare in a spiritual, physical but mostly mental fashion for the trials and thing that lay ahead.

It is also an opportunity to ingratiate myself in a fake but sincere way with the rather attractive judging panel and use the excellent software and site that the brilliant unsung heroes of Hubpages staffers provide. I am so grateful for the hel (ed: cut short – pointless, they won’t buy it).

As someone who is rather short on original ideas I thought I could, sorry, the writer thought he could, get some mileage out of analysing the rules and checking for any possibilities of a humorous nature. Unfortunately there were none – so this page will have to serve as a helpful informative article instead.

Oh yeah. Credentials. Gotta have ‘em. I was twice selected for a HubNugget and came fourth both times. You can’t get much higher than that in my opinion, or indeed the opinion of my legal team, should there be any more people wishing to try it on in a courtroom sense. I do wish people wouldn’t bother. It’s not clever and it’s not funny, and I don’t have any money anyway.

Without further ado, as they say in some novels although not the sort I read, let’s get this page running – word wise.

Note: Specific rules vary from competition to competition. These were the rules for the original competition. They will be different this time around. Please check, and whatever you do, don't blame me.

• Join Hubpages. Well OK, that’s covered obviously. Next.
• Write an entry. What? Oh I see, it’s humour. At least I hope it is.
• Tag it with WritingContest. No problem – got that covered.
• Click the Publish Button! Jeez. So far this is pretty low level stuff. You want to win a writing competition – then you need to write. For clues on what to do if you are hungry or tired check the Help Forums.
• 400 words. By the time you’ve introduced it, summarised it, credentialed it, linked it and put a bit of content in (not too much) then job done.
• Original. Not copied, actually written by your fair hand.

Long-tailed niche. Oh dear, I actually almost understand what that means. I’ve been here too long.

Search-friendly title. Are people actually looking for this? In my case the answer always seems to be no – either that or my summary is off putting. However I am hoping to come up with a real doozy for the competition, perhaps something like “How to Make Money Writing”.

Excellent writing. Grammar and capitulation. Oh - capitalization. Seriously? You enter a writing competition and you might not know where the capital letters should go? I must be missing something here. Hopefully it’s alright to SHOUT occasionally.

Attractive formatting. My personal failing. Writing is easy – graphics and stuff harder. Oh well, make a note of that one.

Judicial capsules. Use all the different capsules, even the pointless ones. I’ll tell you this for nothing – I am not putting a map of where I live on this entry.

I vaguely understand why someone who lives in Sudan can’t enter. We don’t like them, right? But I don’t get the exclusion of Quebec? Unless it’s some sort of colonial backlash thing that’s passed us by in Merry England.

I’m bored with the rules now - the small print stuff goes on for a while. It’s not as funny as I had hoped when starting this.

Note to self: Always plan your article before starting – it will save embarrassing moments where you simply run out of steam.

Some entrants will be rather good at writing and will have some informative information to inform their readers.

Their page will be attractive, interesting and well written.

These are the competition, your enemy.

One way to improve your chances would be to study these writers and learn from them – to practice your own skills until you feel that your output is of a similar standard.

The other way is to try to undermine their belief ahead of the competition.

Visiting the forums and singling these people out for some flaming may well distract them from their usual writing but it could lead to a temporary ban. I’m not sure if that includes banning from the competition so I have written to the judging committee to clarify the exact position.

The other more subtle way would be to visit their current output and undermine their belief in their writing ability with some well judged comments. Here are some suggestions.

• I read your ‘article’ and, apart from the grammatical problems, I did find some of it slightly interesting.
• You are definitely improving in your writing – nearly there!
• This piece was a slight disappointment after your last great effort about toasters.
• I hope you are not thinking of entering this for the contest!!!
• I wonder if this effort would not be better suited for a blog.
• May I ask - is English your native language?

Can I point out that I will NOT be particularly amused if anyone thinks it is a neat idea to put these comments into my own comments section for this article.

I'll preface this with the "winning isn't everything" homile, even though we know that it is.

I noticed that this How to Win didn't have a whole lot about actually, er,winning.

So here's what I do, and if I ever win anything, it will be the reason.

Study the rules. Make sure you have grasped them properly and prepare to write something along the lines of what they are looking for.

Think about that something. Draft it, sketch it out and leave it for a while. Come back and expand on it.

Do the very best you can. Use all those tricks you have learnt for writing and formatting. Make it coherent and pleasing to look at.

Leave it some more.

Think about it. If anything occurs that can be added or improved - then do it.

If the competition runs over several days don't enter on the first or the last days. Choose somewhere in the middle. The reason for this are the chances of you getting a deadline wrong, or the judges doing the same.

To sum up. You probably won't win. I never do. But if you have done your best and can be proud of what you produced then the worst thing is that you got a damn decent article out of it.

And that's no bad thing.

I hope this page has helped you as you consider entering the competition, but obviously I hope it hasn’t helped too much.

I wish you all the best of luck up to say second place or maybe a mention somewhere, perhaps not in the newsletter.

I haven’t yet written my competition winner, er, sorry, entry so there is still some small doubt as to whether I can pull this off along with my previously mentioned fourth place Hubnugget thing.

Not in my mind though!

I’m pinning most of my hopes on (ed: name removed) who as far as I can see hasn’t actually got any writing qualifications. The others might be a bit trickier to convince although I now see one of the judges is in Marketing so, well, let’s not alienate anyone straight off.

Good luck to all!

I briefly considered entering this for the competition but then I’d have to wait until the official starting date. And so would you.

The software Word was used for the bulk of the content and then just cut and pasted into Hubpages really.

I use a Windows PC running Windows and Internet Exploder with a traditional keyboard and mouse arrangement.

Information was mainly sourced from the Hubpages competition rules page.

This page is provided under copyright of the Shangdoc International 

Content Farmers and Freelance Copy Writer’s Association – 2011.

I have been asked, well told, to point out my record in actually winning competitions.

Most times I have come second to none or in other words, last.

That's right. Not once has any of my output been selected for anything, other than those meaningless "gosh that's good" mumblings. No money. Not a bean.

Despite this, in common with all internet experts, I feel it is reasonable of me to have penned a "how to". My lack of knowledge is on the exact same level as those internet millionaires who haven't got any money at all.

I justify this by considering it is only a matter of time before I am asked to climb the stairs at the award ceremony and gratefully receive my fifty dollars and a certificate printed from Word.